Hi blossoms,
I’ve been feeling a little less confident recently and thought I’d share how I gained confidence in the past and something I gonna start practicing more. That practice is actively being mindful in finding beauty in others. How could that connect to your confidence though?
Well, the more you talk, listen, and see people, you realize many of your problems aren’t unique. And that’s not to make you feel bad or invalidate your experience but to give comfort. When I was younger and saw pretty girls with acne or body hair, I was comforted to see that even with those “flaws,” they were still gorgeous. It didn’t make other people ugly, so why would it make me?
Still, growing up now, it’s nice to see other people have those same “flaws” that might make you insecure. The most recent for me was hip dips. I didn’t mind them, then suddenly you hear someone else say something, and you look now, and it’s a problem. As I ran into women, though, or saw them on my feeds, I realized a lot of them had hip dips too. That wasn’t my first thought though; when I first saw them was probably something like, “They’re stunning”. If hip dips didn’t take away from their beauty, why should it take away from mine?
The way I practice is in the form of compliments. I walked around stores and gave them out. It started with clothes and shoes; whenever I saw something I liked, id go up and say it. Not only are you (maybe) going out of your comfort zone to talk to strangers, but you’re also making their day! That is a flex and booster all by itself. But this would also cause you to look more closely at people and maybe eventually see a little of yourself in them.
I find this also works for the quirks in your personality that you’re not too sure of. I used to hate how excited I got about things or how I could ramble, but when I met someone with one or both traits, I realized how I felt about them wasn’t because of those two traits. That didn’t define them. People still enjoyed being around them, people didn’t think they were annoying, and people liked and took that person as they were. Who’s to say people couldn’t feel the same about me?
This may not be a surefire way, and I don’t know if there’s any science behind this specifically, but it definitely helped me gain perspective. I gained the ability to see myself in a different light. It won’t happen overnight, but with consistency, you might feel a little differently about yourself and maybe even the world around you.
Find beauty in people because one day you’ll find out you’re a part of that people group.
This week that you’re reading this, I challenge you to give five compliments this week; it could all be in one day or break it up, but really give those compliments. And for the be results, let those compliments be for strangers.
P.S.A. Do not lie to people; find things that you like to comment on!